Dear Left Fingerless Glove,
I understand you have a desire to be just like your right handed twin, but its better for you to be an individual. Just because Right Fingerless Glove lasted a month for me to painstakingly knit does not mean you have to give me the same problems. Just because I ended up with five perfectly fine cables on Right by no means makes me some kind of expert on knitting cables. I frogged Right so many times that Right started to fuzz, so many times that it crossed my mind on several occasions to just scrap the entire project! Do you have any idea what would have happened if I had?! DO YOU!!?!
You would have never existed Left! You would have remained a lonely ball of yarn! You would have remained in the bowels of my yarn basket to be forgotten and lost forever. I have frogged you twice thus far, once because you had the audacity to have a messed up cable, and once again because you ignored the fact that without a thumb hole I’d have to chop off my left thumb in order to wear you, and I do NOT want to chop off my left thumb just to wear you. You can get away with a couple frogs but don’t you dare for a Bob-loving second assume I’m going to forget your ungratefulness. I created you and I can un-create you! You don’t want to end up as a large pile of yarn barf, do you? Or be used to create an off colored pile of doggie doggie caca, right? I didn’t think so.
With Love and Understanding,